Sports

NFL’s New Study Suggests Football Is Less Fun Without Concussions

The NFL has published a new study that suggests there may be a significant correlation between football’s “fun factor” and player concussions. The study found that as concussions occur less frequently, patron “fun” also decreased.

“I love my team and everything, but seeing a player hit the ground and the game stopped to bring in the medics is like the ultimate thrill for me,” says fan Andy Fuselli. “It just doesn’t get any better than that.”

The results of the study has put the NFL on the offense, and has left team owners and coaches struggling to find more ways for players to get concussions on the field. Talks of recalling helmets altogether have been heard around the stadiums, and players are tackling each other left and right.

Coach Robbins says it’s unavoidable. “Our fan base is everything. If they stop watching because players aren’t getting hurt often enough, we might as well call it quits. We have no choice but to adapt.”

Fortunately, hospitals all over the country are developing plans for special “concussion centers” to accommodate this rise in player injury.